Reflection #5

Reflection #5
What can I really say about today? I think I would really have to say that I really didn’t get anywhere today, which angers me to no end.
I had my mind set all day on the high bar. I need to tackle that one event down because I have all the others like they are nothing, but this. This one event is going kill me. I do not get it! What is really so hard about a damn pull-over? I’ll tell you...it is because I am so freaking weak. I suck when it comes to muscle. No joke, which is what, is holding me back. If I had Vin Diesel like muscles, I’d have no problem. At first I thought maybe it is because I am being so negative, but no. I KNOW that is not the problem. It’s me! Now that I think about it, I really should have started working out a long time ago. It’s healthy, good for the body, why not? No, Nolan Burke is too damn lazy to go to the gym every single day of his life and become a body builder. When I think about the bars, I get so aggravated.
So competition is two weeks away. I missed the first one because I lost the coaches number. Boy; were they mad at me. I didn’t know what to say but it was my fault and I’m sorry so I know I had to promise that I would be at the next meet. That is another thing that keeps me a little aggravated. That meet; level four, I feel like a dumb retard that just started. I mean yeah; I just started but still I could do a higher level. Even level five would have been better than level four. I’m a senior competing at level four. That is rare. I tell myself all day that it is only for the first competition. I think that I just worry too much about what other people think about me. It’s funny, but really all I think about is those little seven year olds who are doing fulls and stuff just looking at me and saying wow I haven’t done those tricks since I was two. That will make headliners. There I go again though, being all dramatic and what not.
Next event; the p-bars; I’m all good on them except when it comes to the lifting up my legs in back of me without touching the bar. I’ve been trying to do it with the extra credit point because I figured that it might be easier which it feels like it is, but still I can’t get it without touching the bar a little. That is going to be a deduction. I don’t know what to do. Because since I am going in as a level four, I want to be able to have all perfect scores so that way, I can switch to level five or even six for the next competition. It doesn’t anger me too much but I will get it, I am very confident in this event.
Yay!!! The floor, every time we go to the floor, I want to kiss it because this is my best event. I’m like a level eight on the four but god forbid I am able to show it at competition. I will be able to at the next one, Lucia just needs me to qualify first and then I can do an upper level when it comes to the floor. That makes me happy because I can’t wait to do better than all those other guys on the floor. Thinking of that makes me all pumped.