Reflection #8

Reflection #8
Today is very important I have to get my full-twist again, because I’ve been lacking so much with doing my full. If I do not do it today well then I’m screwed because I know that I won’t do it anymore.
Already I walked into internship with a horrible mood, what in the god’s name for real because I know that for a fact with a bad I cannot do anything. So what am I supposed to do? I wish that I could be like Amarfy who wants to just be able to wake up and do an aerial without ever having to learn how to do it. WE all know that that is not possible. That is why we have dreams right?
Like every single day of internship, we started off with conditioning and then we moved on to the bars. Seriously they need to think of a whole different method because I am so sick of losing all of my energy for the rest of the day after the bars. It’s like you should just shoot me in the arms and just forget about doing anything. Hahaha… So I found out that the whole time I was holding the bars wrong. When I fixed my hands I was like damn man, this means more rips. I mean I like rips and everything because it proves that you are really dedicated and do not stop at what ever I am trying but they burn seriously. I do not want a rip right now. Screw it, I did it and I felt my skin pulling. I knew a rip was coming but all I got was a rip in my old areas that I rip in. What ever; it’s all good.
Today was an off day for the P-Bars. I was doing my swings and it seems like my body is too heavy to swing. I was laughing at myself so bad because it felt like I was falling forward. I was going to bang my head and I fell and I was laughing. I think I’m just done with getting mad at myself when I mess up. I tried to do a level five routine. I worked on the beginning and I got it. I was so happy for real maybe I can actually move up a different level that would make me feel like I accomplished life. Level five is awkward because you actually have to run at the bars and then jump in between the bars. It feels weird because you feel like you are going to it your arms on the bars. But if you keep your arms inward, really close to your body, you will be fine. I did it and that’s that. Go me, oh yeah, Go me….wooowooo
Time for the floor. We started to go across the floor with simple things for now like always. Hand stands. Forward roles. Kart-wheels and things like that. Now we are at the harder stuff. I started to do my layout to get ready for my full. I was not comfortable so I did my layout again and again and again. Now I was ready to try it. So I am standing front of the mat like I always do to get ready for my full and I was hesitating because it had been a while sense I did it. Lucia is on the side waiting for me to do it. She was like rushing me to do it. Hurry up, we are waiting and I’m telling her that if I’m not comfortable I know I will not land it. Damn, I’m still not feeling it. I finally go after her rushing me and I do not land it. I was like two feet from the floor. I could have probably kissed the floor if I wanted to while I was doing the full. I could of landed it if I went up a but because I was being rushed it was horrible. I fell and hurt my ankle man, I was so damn angry at her. I didn’t do anything the rest of the night.